I was taught to listen to others more than to myself.

No, hahaha, of course not. I am trained to listen to and ”take responsibility” for my own voice. Because only I can do that, only I know how to listen to my own voice. Of course! On the other hand, I am also taught that there is no excuse for not being perfect (”Es gibt keine Entschuldigung dafür, nicht perfekt zu singen!!”); that no matter how impossible a score looks, just practice, practice, practice; that if you don’t do this gig, your colleagues might not be able to do it either (= no one gets paid). The show must go on. In short, you always have to sing. Perfectly.

I’ve also been instructed to observe and be aware of things in my singing to improve and deepen. Now, this is good and a truly essential part of being an independent, professional artist. However, it can easily lead to a constant search for flaws and mistakes. What we search, we find. As a singer/musician, I have been corrected and commented on so many times by teachers, conductors, critics, directors, colleagues, coaches, myself, etc., to the extent that I forgot what it was like to really trust my body, ears, and intuition. The sometimes necessary self-criticism can, in fact, be extended to criticize our ability to actually listen to ourselves and take responsibility for real.


To learn more about this journey, go to the Instagram account Singing without my voice or go back to main page and read the posts there (updating the posts daily).